Calder Connection

Utah!

2011-11-23T18:50:00.000-08:00

I know everyone is concerned that the Calders have disappeared, but don't you fret! We are alive and well here in Texas!

Our big vacation this year was to Utah where we were able to visit grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and siblings.

Della was really excited to leave on vacation...

Especially after enduring the Texas summer (the hottest summer on record since of any state ever since they started taking records!). When we left Houston it was 102 degrees and when we arrived in Salt Lake City it was 89 degrees. Aaaaaaahhhhhhh!

I (Caitlin) took both kids on the airplane alone a few days before Chad. Della was so good on the plane, especially with her brother and her chewy tube (aka her "pipe") to keep her entertained...

We stopped at In-N-Out on the way from the airport. It was delicious, and so was the lady's hair behind me...

We stayed with the Millers where there lots of loves for Della. She was in heaven!

Archer got to spend time with both his Utah and California cousins!

One of his visits ended like this...

Archer also got to go rock wall climbing with a friend from church who recently moved from Texas...

The Millers got us tickets to go see "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat" or as Archer calls it "Joseph and the Amazing Tropical Dream Coat of Many Colors,"at the Hale Theater. Archer was amazed the entire time and had a lot of questions which he "whispered" very loudly to Heather.

Archer was completely star struck when we got to meet the cast after the show. Here he is with Joseph...

But the highlight for him was meeting Pharoh. On the way home Archer said "I think Pharaoh was kinda copying Elvis."

And then there were the puppies! Scott and Jill brought over their sweet little puppies. Archer was half in love with/ terrified of them. He is mostly afraid of dogs, but the puppies were so cute that I think they may have won him over. While playing with the dogs, Archer leaned over and whispered "I think the dogs like me more than Scott and Jill."

The Millers took us up to Olympic Park to check out the zip line and alpine slide.

It was quite an adventure! Here is a short video of what we did.

We may have all gotten a little sunburned...

Chad was able to visit a former mission companion where they spoke Tongan and ate a whole bunch me'a kai na'e 'ifo (that's "delicious food" for all you palangis out there)...

One of the more exciting parts of our trip was Della's haircut! It only took 4 grown adults to make it happen; Grandma held her right arm and leg, Caitlin held her left arm and leg, Chad held her head, Heather did the cutting, and Della did the screaming and thrashing! This picture was before it started to go downhill...

But look how cute it turned out!!!

Oh the joy of NEVER having to deal with this again!

We had so much fun in Utah. A big thank you to everyone who made our trip so special!

Things I Learned From Butterflies

2011-07-30T08:11:00.000-07:00

We bought passes to the Houston Museum of Natural Science last year and they have already paid for themselves. HMNS is second in attendance only to the New York Museum of Natural Science (where "Night at the Museum" was filmed). HMNS has a lot of really cool stuff in it, but for some reason we had never been to the butterfly zoo. It's not like we couldn't see it the giant 3-story glass building that houses the zoo...

Here is the satellite view from space (or Google Maps). I added the information on handicapped parking because I love how close it is to the entrance...

We finally took the time to go see the butterflies and after experiencing it, I don't think we can ever visit the museum again without a trip inside the butterfly zoo. There are lots of tropical flowers, trees, vines, plants, etc. growing inside the solarium(?). The simulated environment is supposed to mimic the rainforest so the temperatures are warm and the humidity high (hence my puffy hair). Strangely enough, on that July day in Houston, the temperature and humidity were higher outside than they were in the actual exhibit. And of course, there were lots of butterflies just floating around.

Enough with the talk already, or as Edna Mode says "Yes darling, words are useless! Gobble gobble gobble gobble!" Props to whoever can name the movie without the help of Google.

See the butterfly right in front of our faces?

Red Peacock Butterfly...

Della thought it was the best thing EVER! You can tell pretty easily whether or not she likes something. But it is rare that you actually see her LOVE something...

In fact, Della loved it so much, she wanted to eat the plants! We said no to that because we are mean...

Notice how everyone is looking off in a different direction, there was so much to see...

As we sat on a bench a large Owl Butterfly landed on Chad's back. Della immediately wanted to swipe at it (and possibly eat it) but Archer's terrified shrieks of protest stopped Della's attempts...

Here are some shots taken by Archer:

Julia Butterfly...

This is a cool shot of some random kid holding a Rice Paper Butterfly...

Della climbing a tree...

At the exit there were butterflies being projected on the walls. Poor Della thought they were real and kept trying to catch one...

After a particularly rough weekend, it was nice to leave all the stress behind and enter this almost magical space. Watching the happiness on Archer and Della's faces as they chased butterflies or marveled at the 50 ft. waterfall, helped me to remember this quote from Pres. Thomas S. Monson: "Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved."

California Cousins + Texas Cousins = Lots Of Fun!

2011-07-17T13:51:00.000-07:00

The Sanchez family came all the way from California to visit us here in Texas! Amy brought her three kids (Nathan, Tyler, and Mia) all by herself (bless her heart as we say here in the South). Initially I was worried that there wouldn't enough to do or that I had to plan some spectacular activity but that wasn't necessary. We had so much fun just being together. Archer and his cousins all lived within 10 square miles and hardly a week went by that they didn't see each other. They even went to the same Preschool.

Here is an early picture of the boys together. Back row L-R: Tristan Plummer, Owen Calder, and Nathan Sanchez (who was having a hard time with the fact that his new brother was here to stay). Front Row L-R: Jack Plummer, Archer Calder (looking at Nathan and hoping that the new sibling thing never happens to him), and Tyler Sanchez. Oh, and on the right is the lovely Amy Sanchez...

These three boys were all born in 2004. L-R Jack Plummer (who looks about 5 minutes old), Archer Calder (who was 7 months and 70 lbs), and Tyler Sanchez (who was 4 months old)...

Archer keeps this picture in his room. L-R Jack Plummer, Archer Calder, and Nathan Sanchez.

Archer not being able to see his cousins was one of the hardest things about moving halfway across the country. When the Sanchez family pulled up to our house it was like no time had passed at all! I did feel bad about one thing, it was so HOT! But the heat made playing in the water a lot more fun.

Mia picking tomatoes. Notice the shoes...

Thank goodness for the pool!

Mia is so cute but she has a killer "pouty" face that will pretty much make you give her what ever she wants. Watch out!

Tyler explaining to his mom all of the reasons he would prefer not to go in the pool. About one minute after I took this shot his mom pulled him in anyway...

Love this one of Miss Mia...

This is how you look when you have already had cancer and you feel like the sun is poisonous...

Tyler said he hates being photographed in the morning...

Della pretty much bossed all the boys around as they played Wii...

We had so much fun and it was so hard to say goodbye. There were plenty of tears shed by all, especially by the kids. Thanks for visiting Sanchez Family!

I Don't Blog Because I Have No Time. I Have No Time Because...

2011-07-15T13:04:00.000-07:00

Here is an e-mail I sent to Chad. I thought it was funny so I am sharing it with you.

Here is what I did today:

-Convinced myself to get out of bed at 5:30AM.
-Went on run (for the 2nd time in 3 years, maybe this time it will stick).
-Showered.
-Fed kids.
-Listened to Archer list 100 reasons why he should go swimming today.
-Put Della in bath.
-Got kids ready.
-Got myself ready.
-Answered 100 Archer questions (mostly about his ideas for using Ken Burns effect in cartoons).
-Went to Dr. appt.
-Explained to nurse that Archer was joking when he said he had a headache.
-Explained to Dr. that Archer was joking when he said his cough was due to "hot fruit punch I drank."
-Tried to shush Archer as he listed to the Dr. 100 reasons why he should go swimming today.
-Got birthday gift for E.
-Made lunch at home.
-Answered 100 Archer questions (mostly about Photo Shop).
-Helped Archer start chores.
-Picked up entire upstairs.
-Checked on Della.
-Called about VTing.
-Listened to Archer list 100 reasons why he should go swimming today.
-Cleaned and vacuumed under Della's crib.
-Vacuumed half of upstairs (we have a small house).
-Checked on Della.
-Noticed that she diarrhead everywhere.
-Cleaned Della with wipes (while simultaneously answering 100 Archer questions {mostly about diarrhea}).
-Gave up on wipes and put Della in tub (again).
-Get Della (re)dressed.
-Put poopy clothes in washing machine (my jeans are included in that).
-Listened to Archer list 100 the reasons why he should go swimming today.
-Finished vacuuming upstairs.
-Put bleach in tub with potty seats and tub toys.
-Tuck Della in bed.
-Quality check Archer's chores while answering 100 Archer questions (mostly about sweating).
-Give back Archer's computer privileges, breathe sigh of relief (SILENCE AT LAST!)
-Cleaned poop off of high chair (it has stained the wood darker)
-Take a break to write Chad this e-mail.

Still Left To Do:
-Listen to 300 more reasons why Archer should go swimming today.
-Empty dishwasher.
-Wash dishes.
-Answer 400 more Archer questions.
-Sweep Della's lunch mess.
-Scripture study.
~~-Take a 20 min. power nap.~~
-Call P.
-Water roses and trees.
-Finish cleaning our bathroom.
-Somehow get mail without neighbor seeing me.

I think that is all,

Love,
Caitlin

Chad's Reply:

You're busy.

Love,
Chad

There's A Lot Going On Upstairs or What's Going On With Della Part 4 of 4

2011-06-14T19:22:00.000-07:00

Let's (finally) end this series of posts on a high note. Here are a few examples of the serious progress Della has made recently...

The past 2 weeks Della has been "babbling" which means she has been vocally producing a consonate-vowel (CVCVCV) pattern. At first I thought it was something she had stumbled upon and wouldn't be able to duplicate it later. But not only has she been "talking" all day everyday she has added gestures and intonations that mimic speech! Della is able to consistantly (although not always on command because she "doesn't feel like it" because she is a stinker) produce reduplicative (same CV pattern: dadadada) and varigated (da-ma-be-ga-buh) babbling sounds. I caught her new trick on video last week...

If you made it to 1:30 in the video, you also can see another major development demonstrating her strength and balance.

Della "gets it" when it comes to using things around the house. Here she is doing her best impression of an average 13 year-old girl (minus the diaper of course)...

Here's Della "playing" (in her mind) the Wii with Uncle Devin. She used to be content sitting on the lap of whoever was playing the video game (preferably Mario Kart) but last month she wised up and started demanding an actual controller...

She tucked her baby doll in for a nap and then decided to she also wanted to lay down...

Della likes to help me clean but she requires her own rag. She also likes to wear eye-protection, just not on her eyes...

I made her clean all of the splatters off the wall from various foods she has thrown. She didn't seem to mind her punishment...

These are just a few examples showing that Della is understanding the world around her. It proves that she is capable of higher cognitive functioning. She is doing the things that toddlers do from tantrums over food to mimicking conversation to wanting to do things that big-kids get to do. We need to take some video of Della using her "Talk Box" because it's pretty amazing how well she can work it. She can navigate from the home page to the food menu, ask for yogurt, then go back to the home page only to pull up a new menu where she tells me she wants to watch "Fantastic Mr. Fox."

I'll end with a picture of Della in her favorite spot...

In spite of all the frustrations we feel over tantrums, and the exhaustion we experience carrying her around, and the fact that she pulls Archer's hair at least 5 times everyday, we love Della sooooo much. Sometimes I get the impression that people think I have some kind of extra patience/goodness/strength or some other special skill. I assure you that this isn't true. I am the same as everyone else. Imagine how it would feel to have a handicapped child. I know it is an uncomfortable thought that we tend to shy away from, but go ahead and put yourself there for a second. That is exactly how I feel. Now imagine all the care that your child might need from you in those circumstances. Would you deny them of your time by not putting in the hours it takes to coax any kind of communication out of them? Would you let them cry it out after a night terror wakes them up at 3AM because you didn't want to get out of bed? Would you leave them in front of the TV all day everyday because it would just be easier? OK-sometimes I do let her watch more TV than I should but my point is, I am not doing anything for Della that you wouldn't do for your own child. We all struggle and sacrifice both as parents and in our everyday lives. My struggle just happens to be one that is more obvious than other people's. I promise you, I gripe and laugh and worry and have fun just like everyone else. I don't ever want to give anyone the impression that I think I'm better than anyone else. I am not trying to put up some perfect but false image of my life. I am just writing as honestly as I can about my experience hoping that another mother, especially those who have a special needs child can understand that the emotional ups and downs of life are normal and that they aren't alone. Overall, life is good and we are truly blessed. We are happy even though sometimes things are hard. Just like everyone else.

Sometimes Della Is A Little Bit Naughty or What's Going On With Della Part 3 of 4

2011-06-02T17:56:00.000-07:00

Della HATES eating dinner...

It's not that she doesn't like the food that I make...

It's not that she has sensory issues or an aversion to certain textures...

It is simply because she wants to be a little bit naughty!

Long ago I wrote about "Old Della" and "New Della" explaining that her progression has turned her into a completely different person. For instance Old Della would lay on the carpet all day whereas New Della is now getting into everything. Well, this post is about how Old Della ate pretty much whatever I put in front of her; pizza, edamame, peaches, etc. New Della however, says she only wants to eat Cinnamon toast crunch for breakfast, PB&J for lunch, and 4 or 5 yogurts for dinner, with 1lb. of Goldfish crackers for a snack between meals. In short, New Della has an opinion. Now, in most respects, this is a really great thing and it shows a lot of cognitive development is occurring. But as any parent who has ever dealt with an opinionated and stubborn toddler, things can get very difficult.

At first I thought, "Della is just trying to assert her individuality and wants to have more control over her life." How cute, right? So I tried giving her options with her clothes, activities, TV shows. No go. The only time she throws a fit is at the dinner table. I realized that this wasn't an assertion of individuality, this was a POWER struggle. Let me tell you, this girl is good (and by good I mean naughty). Della starts fighting the second we walk towards the dinner table. She throws her food, then throws her plate, then throws her silver wear, then a full glass bottle of hot sauce and if you don't watch out your dishes are next! We've tried everything; time outs, making her clean up her mess, yelling, shoving food in her mouth, giving her options, not giving her options, sending her to bed, doing what the book says, doing what the other book says, doing the opposite of what both books say, threatening to never let her compete in the Special Olympics (OK, that might be a little bit more of my dream than hers). Nothing has worked.

I know we are a huge part of the equation and that she is playing us like a fiddle, but I am at a loss. There is no book called "How To Help Your Kid Eat Even If You Have No Idea What The Heck Is Wrong With Her!" Trust me, I've looked. To make matters worse she has gained one pound in the last year and at 4 years-old she now tips the scales at a whopping 28 lbs. So we are going to have an ~~intervention~~ evaluation by an Occupational Therapist who might be able to help us with feeding. I ain't gonna lie, I am praying for a miracle (and a lot of patience)! What a stinker! Good thing she is cute.

Here she is sneaking some cereal for dinner upon realizing that Chad was BBQing for dinner (as seen through the window)...

BUSTED!

Della's Ninja Suit or What's Going On With Della: Part 2 of 4

2011-05-20T17:27:00.000-07:00

This is Della wearing a SPIO suit which makes her look like a ninja...

SPIO stands for Stabilizing Pressure Input Orthotics. The first time Della put on the full suit she took NINE steps BY HERSELF!

How does it work? I do not know. But here is my interpretation. Della seems to have a disconnect between her brain and her body. Most of us have a built in sense (like taste or smell) to know where our body parts are without having to look at them. Wikipedia says (very official, I know) "Proprioception: is the sense that indicates whether the body is moving with the required effort, as well as where the various parts of the body are located in relation to each other." When someone lacks this sense it is called "apraxia". This is from the Internet (I do realize that Internet with a capitol "I" is not an official source but I lost the site I copied this from), "Apraxia is a disorder of the brain and nervous system in which a person is unable to perform tasks or movements when asked, even though:

The request or command is understood

They are willing to perform the task

The muscles needed to perform the task work properly

The task may have already been learned

Della's receptive language abilities are much higher than we had thought. We think she understands most of everything that we say to her. But she can't talk even though she tries. She can say some words like "ball" or "bubble" for example very clearly at times and then at other times she tries to say one of these words but then she hears herself making sounds that she knows aren't right and it frustrates her.

So what does the suit do? It really really tight. The shirt looks like it would fit a Cabbage Patch doll. But the fact that it is so tight means that her arms and legs and trunk and even her internal parts are constantly giving her brain input saying "Something is squeezing me." Kind of like wearing a wedding ring. I have been wearing it for 10 years but everyday, usually several times, I think to myself "I am wearing something on my finger." Maybe Della waves her hands and shakes her head and grinds her teeth and who knows what else because she doesn't naturally get that input from the different parts of her body. So the suit eliminates her need to do those things almost entirely. It was pretty amazing to see her so calm.

The ways that this could help Della are limitless. Eating, walking, talking, playing, attention span, etc could potentially all be improved. You can read about some success stories on their website.

The suit is expensive, so we thought we would try the less expensive/very ghetto alternative, Ace Bandages...

Look at that face. Do I even need to tell you that it didn't work out so great? So we will be getting our own suit soon and we'll keep you posted.

The Results Are In (Again) or What's Going On With Della Part 1 of 4

2011-05-18T21:23:00.000-07:00

There have been a lot of things going on in Della's life and instead of trying to put it all in one post, I am going to do it in 4 to spare you the endless reading and me the obligation I feel to post it all in one night. So, here we go...

For some reason all of Della's annual visits her many specialists fall between the months of February and April. My calender looked like this for 2 solid months. Why do I do this to myself?

Della says she hates all of the appointments and tests...

We got the last of the results in last week and here is what we found out. Nothing. OK, well not nothing, but it feels like that. Let's start with Neurology. The waiting list to see someone in this field is months long, so when we moved here I took the first available appointment... 50 miles away. I recently requested to see a new Neurologist closer to home and it just so happens that we got in with Dr. Zeller who is the HEAD of the Blue Bird Circle Clinic for Pediatric Neurology at Texas Children's Hospital (TCH). Seriously, Divine Intervention. He was wonderful with Della and didn't mind when she pooped her diaper the second we got into the 10x10 foot exam room and then tried to hit him with his own reflex hammer because she was angry that he had hit her with it. It was highly embarrassing. Anyway, Dr. Zeller is confident that Della's condition is not the result from brain damage. We had always thought there was a chance that this was the case after her scary delivery and when she almost died of RSV. Not so. Dr. Zeller feels that she had a genetic condition that technology isn't able to "see" yet. He also thought it disturbing that she can do this...

He agreed that her low muscle tone needed to be addressed with Physical Therapy (which we are already doing). Then he said "See you next year."

The other major appointment was with the TCH Genetics Clinic which FYI, is the largest genetics clinic in the country. Our Geneticist, Dr. Graham pretty much repeated what he said last year and confirmed Dr. Zeller's theory, that Della's condition was genetic and that we don't have the technology to see it yet. BUT, there are some exciting developments in the field of genetics and they have recently been able to see an individual's ENTIRE genome sequence which is made up of 6 BILLION chemical units! Now as impressive as this might seem all of this information is moot without a computer program that can decipher and organize the information. Then Dr. G looked at me and said something awesome, "Don't think that Della will be an adult by the time you finally can put a name to what she has. Chances are high that you will know in 3 to 5 years." I was so stoked. I do realize that putting a name to what she has won't change her prognosis. A child with Down Syndrome still has Down Syndrome whether it is identified correctly or not. You can't change DNA. BUT- if there were ever another child born with the same genetic condition that Della has, they would be able to look at our daughter's life and have an idea of what they can expect and how they can best help their child. Who knows, maybe they will call it Della-itis. That was a terrible joke.

Besides those two appointments her renal (kidney) ultrasound came back good as did all her blood work (7 vials were taken on one draw! It was awful!), her urine test also came back normal, and the repeat of the Microarray didn't show anything. So that is good too I guess.

For anyone who hasn't been to a children's Neurology or Genetics Clinic, it can be a highly emotional experience. The waiting rooms are filled with children with all sorts of problems and seeing these little ones suffering is difficult for me. I'll admit that after these appointments, although I felt hopeful, I left feeling more than a little sorry for Della and for myself and as I guided her walker down the main hallway I was choking back some tears of self-pity. Then I had an experience I can never forget. A family with a little boy Della's size were headed the opposite direction. Before they could pass us, Della used her deft walker maneuvering skills to stop the little boy by stepping directly in front of him. As I tried to set the boy free from Della's trap, I saw that he had no face. Literally, no face. I won't get into too many details but most of his face was smooth with a small opening that was his mouth and one eye on the side of his head where his ear should have been. It was shocking. I apologized to the mother for my daughter's reckless driving and she politely answered me in Spanish. I left the hospital ashamed of myself and also with a renewed sense of gratitude for my family and for the countless blessings we have been given.

I leave you with this picture of Della hanging out in her laundry bin fort...

Goings On In Spring 2011 (It's is a horrible title but that is the best I could come up with.)

2011-05-09T19:40:00.000-07:00

We have been busy the past few months and this is a summary of what's been going on:

Here is Archer looking thrilled to be photographed eating ice cream amongst the flowers...

We went to the Mental Health/Mental Retardation Authority (MHMRA) Autism and Intellectual Disability Awareness BBQ. MHMRA provides services to adults and children with intellectual disabilities in the Houston area. It was both comforting and scary to see so many families in situations similar to ours. There were a lot of older parents taking care of their "adult children" with serious physical and mental disabilities. I got choked up several times as I watched these aging parents dance with, spoon-feed, and lovingly taking care of their sons and daughters. I asked Chad if being at the event made him sad. He said "No, it doesn't make me sad, it makes me thankful because it could certainly be a lot worse." Why is he so much wiser than me?

I like how Della looks a little disgusted as she pets the baby duck...

Here is a picture of Archer hiding in the Lousiana iris. This also happens to be the exact moment that he sat on stinging nettle. Who knew that such a little plant could evoke so many tears?

Della is currently obsessed with airplanes. She likes to eat dinner while holding one. Well, maybe I should clarify. She doesn't actually eat dinner, she just likes to hold the airplane instead of eating dinner. Notice how there is no food in front of her. Don't let that sweet face fool you, she can be very naughty at times!

Archer's school doesn't dress up for Halloween so instead, the first grade classes dressed up as their favorite characters from a book. Here he is as "Serious Harry Potter"...

And here he is as "Happy Harry Potter." I love that his new teeth look giant in comparison to his baby teeth...

My good friend Julia was on tour with Thomas the Train and she was able to spend the night at our house on her day off! We had a lot of fun catching up. She got us tickets to the show and we had so much fun! Well, 3 out of the 4 of us had fun. Della was half terrified and half fascinated and she watched most of the show hiding behind my hair...

Della said she didn't want to look at the camera...

And this is just because I like it...

Della Says "Walking Is Cinchy!"

2011-04-27T06:50:00.000-07:00

The rumors are true, Della has taken some steps on her own and we caught it on video! Thanks to everyone who has helped her reached this goal in the past 4 years! There was a point where I was beginning to doubt if Della would ever accomplish what she has. Enjoy!

Houston Rodeo 2011

2011-04-06T12:50:00.000-07:00

This is our third year going to the Houston Rodeo and this time my cousin from SLC was visiting and came with us!

We checked out the animals and came across a huge section of rabbits. I kid you not the woman next to me said "Wow! Look at all the meat on that one! It would feed me for a week!"...

Besides the rabbits we checked out all the other livestock including poultry, goats, pigs (they smelled awful), the cows...

John Deere had a large display area which of course we had to see...

Every year the rodeo hosts the World's Championship Bar-B-Que Contest and there is a list of the winners and where you can get their food. We had the yummiest pulled pork sandwiches. Actually the picture looks kind of gross...

My cousin Heather enjoying her lunch...

Chad and Archer enjoying their food...

Della said she just wanted to eat some graham crackers...

Then of course there were the rides. Here is Archer waiting in line to climb the rock wall...

I think he was a little nervous...

You can watch this short video which features Archer on various rides...

He spent 50 tickets trying to win this monkey prize, which he finally did on his very last ticket...

He was so excited...

He even buckled it into the car seat next to him...

Best 50 tickets ever spent...

Archer and Heather...

I leave you with this awesome parting shot of us in front of a trash can...

March 2011 In Pictures

2011-04-05T21:54:00.000-07:00

This month I decided to only use pictures of flowers. Spring lasts approximately 2 weeks here in Houston, so we try to enjoy it before the heat sets in.

Top Row (L-R): Ana apple blossoms, Galilee Double Blue Larkspur, Kiowa blackberry blossom, Cilantro blossoms (which turn into coriander seed).

Bottom Row (L-R): Ana apple blossoms, the month, Gulf Beauty plum blossoms, Tropic Snow peach blossoms.

Happy 175th Texas!

2011-03-07T12:21:00.000-08:00

One of our family goals this year was to take one day-trip a month together. In February we went to the 175th Anniversary of Texas declaring it's independence from Mexico. I would be scared of some rebel fighters whose flag had a cannon on it with the slogan "Come And Take It".

We drove to a state park called Washington On The Brazos aka The Birth Place of Texas which is in the city of Navasota and is 50 miles north of our house (confused yet?). The weekend we went was the actual 175th anniversary date and to celebrate the park had set up camps that resembeled the ones along the Brazos River in 1836. There were people dressed up and demonstrating things like:

Blacksmith-ing (something tells me that's not the correct term)...

Candle making...

Quill-writing...

Long-horn handling...

Cannon-firing...

(which kind of terrified Archer)...

And how to correctly wear three or more animal pelts at the same time...

This guy asked us if we were "natives" and we said that we had moved to Houston almost 3 years ago from California. I think we digusted him because I am pretty sure he turned around and spat. I could be wrong though. I could be wrong again but I think we met this guy's brother at the 2009 Indian Pow-Pow.

Della's experience consisted of dragging one of her parents from tree to tree so she could get a good look at each one. She could have cared less about the live (or dead) animals that surrounded her...

Sissy wore herself out walking around and Daddy was happy to give her a ride...

We ate hot dogs, chicken, and pickles for lunch but the best part was the homemade potato chips. They took a whole potato, sliced it up in some fancy machine, and deep fried it, all while you were standing there watching. So good (or bad)...

Archer wore his boots and leather satchel he got from the Pow-Wow for the occasion. We asked him if he wanted to pick up a souvenir to commemorate our trip. He enthusiastically told us that yes indeed he would like a souvenir. Then he suggested a $30 arrowhead. We said no. So he settled on this rock...

Can you tell how thrilled he is?

I was hoping the kids would fall asleep during the car ride home. But that didn't happen...

Although it was close...

BTW- That's chocolate on her face from the M&M's we feed her during car rides so that we don't have to listen to her crying and/or grinding her teeth which she does constantly.

I end with this picture that Archer requested I take. Can you read the sign?

It says "Kickapoo Rd." which is hilarious...to a 7 year-old. And apparently also funny to a 34 year-old, and a little bit funny to a 29 year-old. Della just laughed because we were laughing.

Love By Archer

2011-03-02T13:55:00.001-08:00

I found this on iMovie. Archer edited the entire thing, added the captions, and put it to music. Double click the video so you can see the full screen. I really hope that this is the way he feels about his life.

February In Pictures

2011-03-02T05:15:00.000-08:00

Top Row: Chicken or Waffle's feet (they keep taking dust baths and scratching around my artichoke plants and exposing their roots. Stinkers!), peach blossom, shells from all the eggs we've been eating.
Bottom Row: Chocolate dipped strawberries that Archer made (with some help), tomato transplants under a grow light, Sprinkles cupcakes (I waited 2 long years for them to open up in Houston! Bonus: It's only 5 miles from Texas Children's Hospital!), "White By The Gate" camellia (they only bloom for 3-4 weeks once a year but they are so worth the wait)

"how to Chase FeMals" by Archer Calder

2011-02-24T07:49:00.000-08:00

If you have a prallblum with grlis heres a sulooshin.

Muterels: Femals

Boys

First you find some femals.

Then you run!

And see hoo wun!

January In Pictures

2011-02-23T08:39:00.000-08:00

Top Row: Archer with his Lincoln statue wearing and his Lincoln shirt, the date, egg in the nest, Della.
Middle Row: Sunrise (no photo editing was used, that's exactly how it came off my camera, more eggs.
Bottom Row: Something I sewed during the hours I sit in a waiting room while Della is in therapy, Della's school and medical records (my goal for January was to organize them), icicles on the chicken coop.

Seven Is From Heaven

2011-02-11T07:52:00.000-08:00

Archer turned 7, that's right, I have a seven year-old son. When did this happen? I hardly remember this baby...

Or this little boy...

You can click here for my all time favorite pictures of Archer.

Now he looks like this...

And I love him even though he never stops talking and does this to my backyard...

For his birthday he got an Abraham Lincoln shirt (thanks Uncle Andrew) so of course when we took a picture with him wearing it, we had to get the statue involved...

Then there was the money book and the Harry Potter t-shirt...

The shirt is from Threadless and is called "House Brawl". The design looks like this...

Thank you to everyone who sent gifts, you all made his birthday very special.

Let's end with this: As he was tucking Archer into bed Chad said "You know pal, if I were the sorting hat in Harry Potter, I would put you in Gryffindor." Archer's eyes got wide and he said "You would?" Chad answered "Yes I would because you are so brave." Chad was relaying the story to me and he quoted something he heard on a TV show, "Sure, we all like to think we would be placed in Gryffindor, but let's face it, we would all end up in Hufflepuff."

It Worked! Or In Otherwords, We Got Us Some Eggs!

2011-01-26T19:13:00.000-08:00

That's right! The girls are laying eggs! Finally. Chad had been getting concerned that our chickens were defective and he started saying things like "If you chickens don't start laying eggs then I might have to make you into soup!" He was kidding. Sort of. But Chicken and Waffle didn't let it get them down. Last Saturday Chad came in the house holding eggs and at first I thought it was a joke. I am not sure why, after all, we do have hens. It is now Archer's job to go get the eggs in the morning and Chad always reminds Archer that he has to say "Thank you for the eggs chickens."

Every afternoon when I sit Della in her chair to each lunch, I start to hear little taps at the back door (which is almost entirely made of glass). It is the chickens peeking into the house...

It is probably because they see this...

I think they are asking me to please hurry and sweep Della's leftovers outside so they can enjoy the feast of PB&J crusts, Goldfish Crackers, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and grapes. So maybe Della isn't being naughty when she throws all of her food on the floor. Maybe she is just feeding the chickens!

The Dinner Battle

2011-01-17T13:28:00.000-08:00

I recorded two nights of what dinner is like at our house. I edited it down quite a bit and only 6 of the 10 rounds made it into the video. It is rather long (6:30) so feel free to skip ahead if you like. I can't get it to fit correctly on the blog, so just double click the video and watch it on YouTube.

Sissy Belle Turns 4 (That's Daddy's New Name For Her)

2011-01-17T12:56:00.000-08:00

Della Belle turned 4 this month. I wanted to do something a little different this year and I tried to celebrate her birthday like any other mother, by doing things that my daughter loves and making it a special time for her. Della's past birthdays have been difficult in that the developmental gap between her and other children who are the same age grows wider and wider. Four years-old is a time for "big girls" who are potty trained, who tuck baby dolls into cradles, and who like to declare their independence by putting on wild mis-matched outfits. Not comparing her to other children is much easier said than done. But this year I tried really hard to just celebrate Della for who she is and what she can do. The following pictures don't really need explanation...

Della's Big Accomplishments From The Last Year

Started using AAC technology to communicate with us. She pushes a button on her "talk box" and the computer voice "speaks" for her.
Took 2 consecutive steps on her own.
Has formed opinions on things that she likes and and what she doesn't in TV shows and food.
Learned to go up the school bus stairs holding onto the railing and the bus driver's hand enabling us to get rid of the wheelchair! This is awesome since loading a wheelchair onto a lift and waiting for it to slowly lower and then releasing the wheelchair takes a long time, especially when it is 40 degrees and pouring rain.
Will (sometimes) eat new foods if they are slathered in ketchup.
Has consistently done her #2's in the potty for one year! That is a HUGE deal to us.
Mastered her fancy new walker with swivel wheels and can now maneuver around a lot faster.
Kicked out one window screen and ripped the other 2 out of 3 screens so she can stick her head out of the family room windows to "yell" at her brother and his friends playing in the backyard.
Realized that there are other options than whatever she is doing at the moment (like watching TV instead of sitting on the potty) and throwing massive tantrums when she doesn't get her way. This is actually good because it shows more advanced cognitive development since she used to lay on the family room carpet all day. Literally.

We love Della so much and we are so glad that she is in our family. She brings so much joy and love into our lives.

Feliz Navidad! AKA: The Christmas of Archer's Golden Abraham Lincoln Statue

2010-12-29T07:25:00.000-08:00

Let's start at the beginning...

Della thought that bringing a tree inside the house was so amazing that she decided to stand up by herself...

Studying the underside of the tree with her infamous "pouty face"...

We went out to River Oaks to look at rich people Christmas lights...

Here are some property listings in the neighborhood, the first one starts at $10 million...

Ahhh yes...Christmas morning. Archer tried to get ours started at 5:20AM. We were able to hold him off until 6...

First things first...CANDY!

Archer gave his daddy a moose head coat hook...just what Chad always wanted...

Della's Christmas didn't start until 9 AM. She got to work right away on pushing her new shopping cart around with Raggedy Anne in it...

She wasn't too interested in the other gifts...that is until she realized there was paper ripping involved...

I edited this one a bit using Picnik...

We decided to visit the Houston Museum of Natural History on Christmas Day. There was a visiting exhibit called "Real Pirates" that Archer really wanted to see. Side note: Archer has been refusing to wear long sleeves because they "get germs all over the bottom of them" so if you were wondering why his sleeves are rolled up even though it was 42 degrees outside when we took this picture, now you know...

This was not one of the "real pirates" by the way. Again with the sleeves...

On the way home from the museum we stopped to get shakes because what else are you going to drink when the wind chill is 35 degrees? Sissy drank an ENTIRE pumpkin shake...by herself...

I asked Archer to smile and this is what I got. I love him...

So for those of you who don't know, we had some Christmas drama regarding Archer's wish list to Santa. He wanted two things, and iPhone (we said no to that) and...wait for it...a golden statue of Abraham Lincoln. I am serious. Well Santa ordered a statue on eBay (which surprisingly comes only in black or white, not gold) on the 11th of December. It never showed up. Santa left a note saying that he only had black and white statues of Abraham Lincoln but he had his elves working on a gold one just for Archer, but it would have to be delivered on a later date. That later date turned out to be Tuesday, it had finally arrived. Behold, Archer's "golden statue of Abraham Lincoln"...

He was pretty stoked...

Whenever he told people that he wanted "a golden statue of Abraham Lincoln" they usually asked two questions, the first being "Why?" Archer answered "Because he was our 16th President and he did some really great stuff. And he looks the coolest of all the presidents." The second question people ask is "What are you going to do with it?" Archer said the same thing every time, "I'm going to put it on my dresser and look at it." Of course.

So when I went upstairs to take a picture of it on his dresser, I was surprised to see that he had built some sort of shrine on his bottom bunk. The Lincoln statue resting on top of his vampire cape (you can see the reflective spiderwebs) and he had respectfully sprinkled pennies around it...

We hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!

Yo Gabba Gabba Live!

2010-12-12T07:50:00.001-08:00

We were fortunate enough to get tickets to "Yo Gabba Gabba Live" thanks to two very awesome friends Ruth and Julia. Lately Della's iPad has been looking like this (I can't get it to rotate, sorry)...

The buttons Della has pushed are shown along the top (or left in the picture) of the screen. If you can't read it, Della has said "I want to watch 'Yo Gabba Gabba!'" over and over and over again. We were excited to see her show some preference as YGG has become one of her favorites. We hoped this would make her experience at the live show even better but I'll admit that I was nervous about bringing her since she tends to freak out around crowds and loud music. Then the lights dimmed...

and she was way into it...

Della's good time was brought to the next level when hundreds of balloons were dropped from the ceiling...

But Della's mind was officially blown when the characters walked past. She was frozen with awe when Muno walked by...

But when she saw Foofa she wasn't going to let this opportunity pass her by. Della literally attacked her...

My apologies to whoever was in that costume. Having worked as a character at Disneyland I know how limited your vision is while wearing the costume and I know how disconcerting it is when someone you cant see is grabbing, pulling, and tugging on you.

Archer was also equally entertained...

And there was a lot of singing and dancing coming from his area...

The highlight of his evening was when Biz Markie asked for volunteers to participate in "Biz's Beat of the Day." Archer got to that stage in record time...

He told me later that he was so glad he had practiced beat boxing at home. Clearly all that preparation wasn't for nothing because he did pretty good!

Leslie Hall came out to do a "Dancy Dance"...

We were able to catch up with her after the show. She is the bravest woman I have ever met...

We had so much fun!

Thank you to all who made it possible for our family to this show. It was a really special experience to see Della recognize the characters as she made the connection between the TV show she watched at home to what she was seeing in front of her. I am not sure we have ever seen her show so much excitement and happiness over something like this. I may have gotten a little teary-eyed. Don't worry, it didn't last long!

November and Stuff

2010-12-11T06:58:00.000-08:00

We went to Archer and Della's school for "Thanksgiving Lunch" in the cafeteria. Don't worry, neither of them ate any of their food...
We had visitors for almost the entire month of November and we loved it! My mom came out at the beginning of the month and we had so much fun. I don't really have any pictures but that is because we were so busy sewing! My mom watched our kids while we went to a Bed and Breakfast for one night. Alone. Isn't she awesome? I confess, I had a hard time leaving the kids, not because I was worried but because I have an unhealthy attachment to them. Anyway, we made it to Brenham which is around 50 miles northwest of Houston and almost halfway to Austin. We stayed here...
Our first stop was a Monastery where Nuns raise miniature horses. I am being serious. Chad and I called it Mini-Pony Farm. Here is a picture from their website...

Look! I found some mini-ponies!

Chad is a little nervous around horses due to a childhood incident...

Then we went to a giant indoor greenhouse. Can you spot Chad amongst the Poinsettias?

We also went to some antique stores which we have never done because we have small children. I picked up this bitty bird (3/4 of an inch high!) to add to Della's collection...I have become a but obsessed with birds since we found out that Della wouldn't grow up to be like other children. I formed this image in my mind that her little spirit was trapped in a broken mind and body, much like a bird trapped in a cage. And like a bird, one day she will be able to escape the physical confinements in her life and fly away. I know, cheesy, but it reminds me that there is always hope which Emily Dickinson puts into words much better than I can:

“Hope” is the thing with feathers

“Hope” is the thing with feathers -

That perches in the soul -

And sings the tune without the words -

And never stops - at all -

And sweetest - in the Gale - is heard -

And sore must be the storm -

That could abash the little Bird

That kept so many warm -

I’ve heard it in the chillest land -

And on the strangest Sea -

Yet - never - in Extremity,

It asked a crumb - of me.

OK-enough about that.

Our last stop was to the Antique Rose Emporium. I never really liked roses until my first visit to ARE where I had a conversion experience. We now have 11 roses growing in our yard. Our newest varieties are Red Cascade (all photos are from the Antique Rose Emporium website except for the Don Juan)... Don Juan...

Pioneer Spirit..
Moonlight...
And Star of the Republic (hmmm...that couldn't be a Texas native could it?)

Sadly our Constance Spry wasn't as spry as we had hoped. RIP...

Then my grandparents came for Thanksgiving. My grandma showed me how to make my first turkey. It was GOOD if I do say so myself...

We enjoyed Papa's famous tacos while they were here...

Even Della ate them. Behold the miracle...

Grandma also made cookies for the kids to decorate. Archer always takes his decorating duties seriously...
Della wasn't sure what to make of it at first...
She didn't like frosting on her hands...
But in the end she came around...

This picture sums up the experience, Archer busy decorating and Della eating a cookie out of each hand...
Papa and Grandma took Archer to get his first pair of cowboy boots. Mission accomplished...

He wears them CONSTANTLY...

It was hard to say goodbye to our family and we miss them so much. Thank you for visiting us!

We also had a freeze at the end of the month...
It finished off our "Juliet" and " Heinz 1439"(yes, as in the ketchup) tomatoes...

Chicken and Waffle didn't seem to mind the cold...

But that's probably because they were snug and warm in their newly finished chicken coop! Didn't Chad do a fantastic job?

Wait, You Mean October Is Over Already?

2010-11-19T12:35:00.000-08:00

Here is a rundown of our very busy October. This doesn't even include the week we spent in California!

At the beginning of the month the kids' school had Rodeo Day. The Houston Livestock and Rodeo Show came and performed square dancing, did lasso demos, explained how corn is grown, showed a model of a chuck wagon, and the kids were taught how to be rodeo clowns by real rodeo clowns (duh). We have lived in Texas for almost two and a half years, but you would never know it from our wardrobe. Archer's outfit consisted of a plaid shirt (I didn't even have a bandanna) and I think he ended up looking more like a Greaser...

I made Della skirt using the Market Skirt tutorial. It has little cowgirls and horseshoes on it...

Archer had career day at school and he wanted to dress as a "Lego Designer." I asked him what Lego designers wore which I thought was a legitimate question. He looked at me with disdain and said "A white doctor's jacket. Geez Mom." Don't worry, I was back on his awesome list after I made and laminated this badge for him to wear on the white jacket.

We participated in the ward talent show this month. Way back in June when Chad and I were deciding on what to play, we separately chose the same exact song out of our 4,700+ MP3's. Our love-mind connection is mucho strong. We played "Stay Gold" by the Apples In Stereo. This is a picture of me FREAKING out...
Chad was a total pro! OK-he has done this before, but he looked so at ease and had a smile on his face the whole time. I was really nervous and this made my mouth so dry that my upper lip was getting stuck and as you can imagine, this made singing very difficult!

Archer originally was going to play a snare and a ride. But a few days before the show he started to get some stage fright. The night before the show he burst into tears and said "What if I ruin the song? What if everyone laughs at me?" We decided downsize to just the ride. He started out a little nervous as you can see from his dead serious expression...

But he lightened up and he did a fantastic job...

As Chad and I walked off the stage we both said "That was so bad!" The more time that goes on, the worse I feel about it! My friend Marissa offered to show me some video of our performance but I literally could not bring myself to watch! BUT, the important thing here is that I actually got up and did it in spite of my extreme stage fright and I am proud of myself, even if I did play most of the song incorrectly. For those who witnessed my butchering of the song, below is a YouTube video I made for Chad and my 9 year anniversary with the original version of "Stay Gold." I'll admit it is cheesy but I did it anyway. The blog format has cut my video in half so if you desperately want to see the full pictures of both skinnier and fatter versions of Chad and me throughout the years, you will have to double click on the video and watch it on the YouTube site.

Then there was Halloween. I have no pictures of Archer because he was running around like a crazy person. This picture is of Della with her bestie Mylah. Della LOVES her. Mylah is so amazing with Della. She doesn't get angry when Della pulls her hair, sticks a finger in her ear, or eats her Skittles lip gloss...

If Mylah is close by, Della has to be touching her...

We had Della use Proloquo2Go on the iPad while Trick-Or-Treating. She did really well. She knew that when we walked up to a house and pushed that button, people gave her candy.

Della says she loves candy...

And that if she puts her head into the pumpkin, she gets a much better view of the goods...

Goin' To The Big D: Disneyland 2010

2010-11-19T11:51:00.000-08:00

Our family was able to go to Disneyland while visiting Calfornia and we got in for free because we got connections like that (thank you!). The day started with the Sanchez family and the first thing we did was locate our brick. The Sanchez brick is surrounded by their family's toes (minus Eli) and the Calder brick is surrounded by, well, you'll have to guess...

Monkeys from L-R: Amy Sanchez, Tyler Sanchez, me, Della, and Miss Mia Sanchez...

Archer and Nate...

Archer thought that the carousel was boring. Don't worry, he made his own excitement...

Archer and Tyler, I think I cried a little bit in this moment...

Cousins Nathan and Mia...

The second half of the day was spent with the Millers. They live in Utah and it can be hard to line up schedules to see them, so we were delighted when they were able to join us.

Archer asking me "What's the most boringest word you can think of?" I answered "Boring." He did not think this was an acceptable answer...

Della signing to Uncle Matt that she would like some more Jungle Cruise...

Newlyweds Scott and Jill on Pirates. Oh how I missed that ride's sweet smell of damp asbestos...

On the Haunted Mansion with Heather...

Della rode with Aunt Shelley on the scooter (Archer was soooooo jealous) and two minutes after this picture was taken, Della hit the gas and ran into a guy. He wasn't very happy and poor Aunt Shelley was mortified because it looked like she was the one doing the ramming!

This was the moment that Della's mind was officially blown...

The entire group L-R: Scott and Jill Miller, Chad, Archer, me, Della, Matt and Shelley Miller, and Heather Miller...

By 9PM Della was beyond done and so I took her home. Archer however, stayed on with his (adult) cousins. Somehow they got him to ride "The Tower Of Terror." I have heard of nothing else since then...

Archer is the one with his eyes tightly squeezed shut...

Finally Archer gets his ride on the scooter...

We had a fantastic trip! It was the most exhausting, jam-packed, and busy trip we've had, but it was also the best one yet! Thanks to all who made it so wonderful.

I end with this shot of Della after we finally landed back in Houston. One of her ponytails was on top of her head and the other was over her ear. It was by far the worst rats-nest she's ever had. Actually, I think dreadlock would be a more appropriate word...

Cam and Lauren's Wedding in California

2010-11-19T06:46:00.000-08:00

Let's begin with an "Ode De Cameron" since this is about his wedding after all...

The paper cross around his neck says "Jesus loves Cameron." This picture makes me laugh every time I see it...
Cameron Fun Facts:

Cameron was the third child born into our family and the second boy. I am 5 years older than he is.
During his Christmas Preschool Program, Cameron was singing a song in the front row when he decided to pull the front of his sweater up over his face and head exposing his torso. He then began swinging his arms around hitting the other children until a Priest came and put an end to that.
Cameron forgot his shoes on not one, but two family vacations. Can you even board a plane with out shoes on now?
Cameron cut the entire front section of his hair off of his bowl cut when he was 3ish. Around the same time he stuck a toy with rotating rubber wheels on his head and it "sucked up" his hair to to the scalp. We could hardly get it out but when we did, Cam was left with a patch of missing hair. Of course we teased him about it until he cried.
Cameron is a little (a lot) competetive. Jon (my brother who is 2 years younger than me) and I made a hobby out of daring him to do stuff. One of the best was when he dared Cameron to bite a rock chipping his tooth in the process.
He broke his arm one summer and somewhere along the way it got wet and is smelled sooooo bad. Cam was constantly smelling it even though it made him gag.
Cameron had a drawer full of letters from girls when he was in Jr. High. Chad and I used to grab a hand full and read them out loud. My favorite ones were from a girl who called herself "Your Angel."
Cameron loves fire. Like seriously loves fire.
Journal entry from 1991: "My baby brothr Cameron loves to wach the trashman. He drolls a lot and we call him Slimer."
Journal entry dated 5/14/1993: "Cameron is such a jerk! I was so mad at him when he ran into the bathroom and locked himself in with BOTH TV controlers. He made me so angry that I said my first curse word EVER! This made me much more mad so I stared kicking the door as hard as I could and then a peice of wood fell out of the bottom and a whole bunch of dust came out. We both got in truobul and then to get back at me he RIPED MY GLOW IN THE DARK ALADIN POSTER ON PURPOSE!!! I punched him in the privates and I GOT IN MORE TROUBU THEN HE DID!!! WHY WAS HE EVEN BORN!!!"
Journal entry dated 8/9/1995: "Tomorrow is Cam's birthday. I got him a Batman Forever lunchbox because my favorite song is "Kissed By A Rose" by Seal. Then I filled his thermos with some of my old pogs." I was such a generous sister.
Cameron once threw all of my barbies into a storm drain and then took a hammer to my doll house.
There are a lot of great things about Cameron, but I won't list them all here because that's kind of boring and no one wants to read that. Suffice it to say that Cameron is one of the funniest people I know, he is a talented musician, an extremely loyal friend, and he is very smart. Lauren, you found yourself a (mostly) wonderful husband!

Please ignore the tumor growing on my face, any extra pounds, and the walrus mustache in the back. I chose this picture for Cam's hair. So awesome...

Cameron served a mission for the LDS church for 2 years in Taiwan. He learned how to speak Madarin Chinese...

Back to the wedding, or at least the rehearsal dinner. My cousin Heather and me...

2 kids+Texas time (2 hours ahead)+ rehearsal dinner=very tired
Della with Uncle Matt...

Chad holding Archer...

Archer was excited to help Cam get ready for the big day...

Cameron and Lauren were married at the Los Angeles Temple. Archer started the day off right with an impromptu modeling session. I am so glad Heather was there to capture every pose...

Cousin Scott provided a lot of entertainment...

I think Della was a little bored but songs from Papa and plenty of Fruit Loops got us through the morning. I have many pictures of random family members (from both the bride and groom's sides) feeding Della Fruit Loops. I can't thank everyone enough for all the willing hands to help with Della. She never would have made it without everyone's help...

Mr. and Mrs. Miller!...

Awww...

We took a family photo in the same spot that Chad and I had stood on our wedding day. Cam and Lauren were married 3 days before our 9th Anniversary...

The reception was in my parent's backyard and it turned out so beautiful...
Isn't my new SIL lovely?...

This picture marks the turning point of the reception for our son. He removed the fabric that was tied to his chair and was wrapping it around his face and body...
He was distracted by Heather's phone for a little while, but after a few minutes he started hysterically sobbing. We asked him what was wrong and he answered "I HATE weddings! I am freezing to death and I am starving to death!" He went to bed after that...
My grandparents...

Cousin Lynley...

Cousin Heather...

Grandparents, Chad/me, and 2 out 3 brothers...

My brother Devin, me, and Cam...(We missed you Jon and Raquel!)

My parents and brothers...

Della starting to get tired...

The kids exhausted the next day...

What We Did On Our Summer Vacation by Chad and Caitlin

2010-10-22T12:14:00.000-07:00

Chad and I are grown ups (sometimes) and we didn't actually have a summer vacation. But that doesn't mean we weren't busy! I started the summer off right by thinking I had been struck by lightning. A major storm cell passed over us...

And for some strange reason I was taking video of it. That's where the lightning comes in. What is up with the new YouTube/Blogger video format? It cuts off a third of the screen! You can double click the video to see the full screen version...

**There have been comments asking me to clarify what happened when I took the video. I have this weird obsession with filming Texas storms mostly because I have never seen anything like them and because I think no one back in California would believe me if I didn't have proof. What I am going to do with hours of storm footage I do not know. But I was filming this particular storm and lightning struck very close to our house. I wasn't actually struck. But I was really scared! Archer thought this was so funny that he immediately got on the phone to tell my grandparents that "mommy freaked out!" Now that you are relieved to know that I am OK, you can enjoy the aftermath of the storm...

In June my husband surprised me with a weekend trip to California so that I could attend my good friend Vilate's wedding. I went all alone. No kids. All by myself. It was awesome. My flight there was interesting because I sat by a guy dressed in all black except for the women's underwear that he had, those were pink. On my way back I was held up by security at LAX. After getting through the line I grabbed my stuff and didn't stop to put my sandals back on. Even though I ran across the airport barefoot I still missed my flight. Don't worry, I Purelled my feet. When I finally did get home, the ENTIRE house was cleaned. Totally spotless. Plus, there were homemade chocolate chip cookies waiting for me. Chad is amazing. Seriously, he is a better wife than I am.

Vilate and Kurt were married at the Newport Beach Temple...

Kurt and Vilate. Awwwwww.....can't you just imagine their super cute blonde kids?

Vilate (Vuhl-ate) and I became friends at Fullerton Community College 9 years ago. I had finally found someone who planned on finishing up that 2-year school in 2 years. Imagine that! Confession: I might have actually spent a little longer than 2 years there. What I mean is that we seemed like the only ones who weren't spending 5+ years at FJC. Vilate and I took "Walking For Fitness" to fulfill our PE credits and the teacher called her "Vio-late" the whole time. After the semester had gone by Vilate told me "You are the slowest walker I have ever met." I'm so glad she waited all that time. I also owe this woman a lifetime of gratitude for introducing me to Sprkinles cupcakes which she brought over to me several times including while Della was in the hospital on a ventilator. The cupcakes helped me physically and emotionally through 2007 which was a rough year. Thanks Vil-ah-tay!

My summer of friendship continued when I had another friend encounter right here in Houston. My friend Julia was on tour working for Mates of State (a really awesome band). Julia and I have been friends for 11 years and we would have been friends sooner had I not been a bratty 16 year-old. True friends forgive each other (thank goodness). That would also apply to the time she was my Maid of Honor/Bride Slave. I'll always remember Julia's wise advice; that my eyeshadow didn't have to be the same color as my clothes. I was liberated at that moment and I never looked back. Oh yeah, and she also speaks Thai. Just in case you needed more evidence as to why Julia is great. This is a very non-flattering picture but this how one looks in a sweaty night club packed with sweaty people...

Julia is crafty. No, I mean it. Not like the occasionally-knit-a-tea-cozy crafty, but hard core I-can-sew-a-wedding-dress crafty. She made this awesome banner. I can't wait to see her again in December when she tours with Yo Gabba Gabba Live...
This show renewed my hope that good bands really will stop in Houston. Occasionally. Which is better than never. We were so spoiled in LA where bands like Belle and Sebastian or Air would play with the LA Phil. at the Hollywood Bowl. Where Red House Painters and Luna would come at least twice a year to the Troubadour (even though I dislike standing room only venues). Then there was the time we could see Mates of State at Koo's once a month.

But then again the amazing Rockabilly/Honky Tonk acoustic show we went to with our friends the Arave's could never have been experienced anywhere in Southern California. We saw Hank Schyma, Johnny Falstaff, and John Evans (who are all over 6 ft. tall) play at a church of all places. Pie was served at intermission which is always OK with me. The show started out strong but the more "Spanish Demon" wine they consumed the more loosey-goosey things got. I can't wait to go again!

Chad started the chicken coup this summer. It is almost done so you will have to wait for pictures of the completed version. Chad is showing the nest boxes he made with the hinged roof for easy egg access. Any day now we should be enjoying some seriously fresh eggs...

Since I am at home with the kiddies, I spent most of my time entertaining them and cleaning up their messes (and pulling small objects from their mouths...well mostly Della's mouth)...

Chad and I worked outside until it became unbearably hot...

Our edamame did (and tasted) fantastic...

A random beet that sprung up out of nowhere...

Chad got a 30 year-old Squeezo (which works great BTW) on eBay and we had a grand time "Squeezo-ing" hundreds of tomatoes and blackberries, a job Chad took very seriously...

And then there were the sweet potatoes...

Harvest from the first plant...

The chickens said they didn't want any...

Our produce model...

In all we harvested 43 lbs. from 3 plants. Sweet potatoes will last a few months if stored in a cool dry place...but only if you don't wash them like this...

We didn't know!!! So stayed up until 1AM canning them so they wouldn't spoil...

We celebrated Chad's 34th birthday in August...

Since we started with a storm, we shall end with a storm. We saw a double rainbow and had to get some footage with Archer narrating...

OK-so you can't really see it, but it was there, I promise.

What I Did On My Summer Vacation: By Della Belle

2010-09-22T11:13:00.000-07:00

Della had a pretty fun summer. She has done a lot of changing and growing in the past few weeks and it's been fun to see her get more and more curious and opinionated. Actually that last one can sometimes be not so fun, but that's life with a toddler right?

We went swimming a few times this summer and Della learned pretty quick that if she saw me with a swim diaper she was probably going to get wet. She would often get a swim diaper, carry it in her mouth while crawling over to me, shove the swim diaper into my hand, and then sign "more". Clearly she was asking me to take her swimming but since I couldn't always do that she settled on being able to wear her swim diaper over her clothes. Once the diaper was on she would go around the house like it was business as usual. But then she would stop and lift up her shirt to check and see if it was still there...

She found a new brush which she decided would be best used on her hair. Don't worry, it was brand new and I hadn't used it yet...

Della discovered the industrial grade headphones that Archer used to wear when he thought vacuuming the stairs was too loud. She also has discovered her brother's shoes which are much cooler than her own...

I had turned on a yoga workout one day and I looked up and saw Della copying me...

You may be wondering what this picture is doing in a post about Della's summer. I found this lamp at a thrift store and thought it would be cute in Della's room. Last month I noticed that Della was crawling upstairs every 5 minutes to go into her room where she would stand holding onto her dresser while desperately reaching and stretching with all her might to grab the lamp. I needed the endless chasing her up and down the stairs to stop so I brought the lamp downstairs. It now sits on our kitchen counter and she insists that it be on at all times. This is a woman who knows what she wants...

Speaking of knowing what she wants, Della has discovered the Disny/Pixar movie "Monsters Inc." Using the iPad she tells us that she wants to watch this movie. Every day. All day. Here is a screen shot of the iPad (which for some reason won't rotate so my apologies for the sideways view). At the top (or on the left side of the picture) is the history showing the buttons that Della has used. Notice it is the same button. Over. And over. And over. It's a good thing Billy Crystal's character is funny, otherwise I would be going a little crazy. *I realize that the display history says "Monsters Ink" but that's because the iPad's "voice" said something weird sounding when we typed in "Inc."

Della discovered her love for making chocolate cookies. Here she demonstrates her favorite cookie-making method...

Remember the disastrous blackberry picking excursion that I mentioned in Archer's post? Well, Della had a much better time than her brother. Here she is with a mouth full of berries...

She liked this trip way more than last year's...

We were only out in the patch for 20 minutes but Della had already turned beet red from the heat (not a sunburn). We rushed her back to the car and turned on the air conditioning and she felt much better after that...

Della's development hovers between 12 and 18 months. Even though she is 3.5 years-old, she still puts everything in her mouth. Like her favorite book "No David!"...

Or her favorite Wii game, Lego Star Wars, which she thrusts into Archer's hands and begs him to play it by signing "more", pounding her little fists together as hard and as fast as she can...

She also enjoys chewing on the cardboard box filled with Wii/TV/DVD controllers that I covered with paper and Modge Podge...

If no paper items are available, then she will settle for a battery...

Belle's hand (this picture is disturbing)...

Or couch cushion stuffing...
I know that batteries, paper, and couch cushion stuffing are dangerous and toxic and I don't allow her eat these things if I can help it. Anyone with a crawling baby knows that you can't catch everything that they put in their mouth and you never know what you are going to find stuffed into the pockets of their cheeks.

I saved the best for last. Della took her first unassisted step this summer! You have to trick her into standing on her own and on this particular day Chad stood in front of her and held his hands out to her. She took one step forward, regained her balance, and then decided she didn't want to walk anymore because she prefers to be carried everywhere. I didn't get her step on video but I did get some footage of her standing by herself. It's a little long and once you see her standing, you get the gist of it. However if you continue watching you can see how she refuses to cooperate with us when she doesn't want to. Also- for some reason You Tube has resized it's screens and it doesn't fit on the blog very well. For the full effect it is best to click on the video twice and to watch it in a new window on the actual You Tube site...

What I Did On My Summer Vacation: By Archer

2010-09-20T17:12:00.000-07:00

We had a busy summer so I thought the best way to document what we did was to divide it into three parts. Archer will be part one, Della part two, and Chad and Caitlin will be part three.

Most of Archer's summer was spent outside in the fort that Chad built. Our backyard was the place to be if you are a little boy who lives near us. They would spend hours out in the yard hammering, eating Otter Pops, and making dangerous looking structures out of precariously stacked scrap wood. I caught this shot of Archer between one of his many trips in and out of the house. Notice the guilty look on his face. I found out later that he had snuck a permanent marker outside...

Archer enjoyed eating plenty of corn that we grew...

When it was too hot to play outside Archer would build couch cushion forts and tents in his room. Here are some of the many things he tied to the bottom of his bed which I had to cut off because I couldn't untie the knots he had made...

I love projects that take up a lot of time and this was one of them. Archer painted these letters and taped them on the garage for Chad's birthday...

He also helped me decorate the door with streamers but Della tore them down and tried to eat them...

Archer spent lots of time with the chickens...

He also started gymnastics this summer. This is the best sport ever! There are no games to attend every Saturday and I spend all of his practices in an air conditioned room. What's not to love!?! Plus, it was the most hilarious hour of my week...

We took a day trip to Old Town Spring where we ate at a super greasy restaurant that was covered with license plates. Archer insisted that I take his picture in front of them...

Chad and I thought it would be fun to take the kids blackberry picking. Boy were we wrong. Apparently this activity is like torture to Archer because he started freaking out. I took some video of the tantrum that ensued after he announced that if he didn't get a drink of water right then, he was going to die of thirst.

Archer also started a blog called Amazeable. Archer chose the name, background picture, and wrote or dictated his own posts. Here is a link to what he wrote over the summer.

Remember how I like projects that take up lots of time? I don't really know why, but Archer had been begging us for an electric pencil sharpener. So back in June I told him that he could earn money to buy a sharpener all his own. It took three months for him to save $11. We made a big deal over our trip to Office Depot to buy the sharpener. As soon as we got home he tore all the batteries out of the Wii controllers and stuck them in the sharpener. I showed him how to lightly push the pencil into the hole and he went to sharpen all of his pencils. On his way to the pencil box, he dropped the sharpener and it broke. He never even got the chance to try it. It was seriously one of the saddest things I have ever seen. Don't worry, we bought him a new one.

One night while getting ready for bed Archer asked Chad "Do you think God has a great deed for me to do like Noah?" Chad said "Oh yes! You are going to be a great missionary and a daddy someday." Archer took this to heart and devised a plan "Dad, I think we should write our favorite scriptures on a piece of paper and give them to our neighbors." Chad told him that the church has already made something like that called Pass Along Cards. Archer was so excited that he wanted to get some from the missionaries ASAP. So the next night they brought over a stack and we talked about who we could give them out to and what we should say. As soon as we were done Archer ran outside to play. As the missionaries were leaving we opened the front door just in time to see Archer running from one neighbor's doorstep to the next. We called him back as we thought it might seem strange to people that the neighbors the hardly knew were sending their 6 year-old son out to preach about Jesus Christ. But don't worry, it didn't deter Archer. He entire stack of cards was gone in a few days.

4th of July in September

2010-09-20T10:52:00.000-07:00

Somehow this year's 4th of July didn't end up on the blog. I know you were all left with a deep sense of longing when we didn't share it with you. So without further ado...

We had some very special guests at our house during the 4th. My brother Jon and his wife Raquel (who is expecting boy #2 in December) and their son Cody...

Archer was in absolute heaven having Cody stay with us. There was plenty of cousin bonding going on...

Della had a good time too (can you tell?)...

Of course there were plenty of fireworks...

Cody was amazed...

Della spent the entire night signing "more"...

And Archer made his mother super nervous by riding his scooter as close as he could to open flames...

Of course there was the quintessential father-son bonding over fire. Notice how Archer had to sit on his hands since he didn't have the self-control not to do extremely dangerous things...

Della signing "more", Archer being Archer, and me doing some sort of crazy pose...

Jon and Cody(isn't Cody the cutest thing?)...

This year's fireworks were pretty awesome, but it just can't beat last year when Chad screamed "This is for America!" before lighting off a few cannon-style explosives.

Houston is so hot and humid in the summer that you sweat constantly, even at night. It doesn't cool off much in the evening. Most nights the temperature stays above 80 degrees with 100% humidity. So that is why my son's hair is wet...

We had so much fun with Jon, Raquel, and Cody. I had only met Raquel and Cody once before so it was great getting to spend lots of one-on-one time with them. We don't know when we will get to see them again since my brother moved from the Air Force Base in Okinawa and is now stationed in South Korea. They are welcome back anytime!

2010-09-06T18:35:00.001-07:00

I have this wonderful friend named Julia. I have known her for the past 10 years and Chad has known her for 20 years! Not long after I became friends with Julia her sweet 8 year-old sister, Carol Joy, was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. Carol Joy had surgery to remove the tumor but a lot of permanent damage had been done. She was hospitalized for months and my dear friend Julia would make the 140 mile round-trip drive to visit her sister as often as she could, sometimes more than once a week! I was able to accompany Julia on some of those visits. In the beginning, Carol Joy was in a coma but Julia would sit by her side and hold her sister's hand and talk to her about anything and everything. Then, as Carol Joy started to wake up, Julia would paint her nails or color with her. Once we took Carol Joy to a "play date" to visit another young girl who was a patient at the same hospital. I remember once visit when Carol Joy asked me to draw a dolphin. I don't even pretend to know how to draw, but I tried anyway. When I showed her my drawing she started to laugh, a lot. Through her giggles she told me that what I had made looked nothing like a dolphin.

I wanted to be a comfort to my friend Julia as she watched her sister struggle through her illness, but my visits started to turn into something else. I wanted to be around Carol Joy. In spite of the long drive, the sometimes scary hospital setting, the difficulty of seeing a child having to suffer in this way, I always left feeling uplifted and hopeful and at peace. I can't help but think that the Lord was preparing me for the arrival of our daughter, another one of these precious spirits whose body would not be like as strong or as healthy as other children's.

A few weeks ago Carol Joy went into surgery to help her smile again. Then last week, she unexpectedly passed away. When I heard what had happened, I had two emotions. I felt sadness, of course, that her life had been so short. I was sad for her family, that they would have the opportunity to see her again in this life. But, I also felt relief. All the pain and the struggles Carol Joy had, it was over now. She was free of the body that had so many limits and frailties.

Carol Joy passed away unexpectedly and like most of us who have a special needs child, her family is having some financial difficulties. An account has been set up to help pay for final expenses. Please donate what you can. Please helo the Knapp family with the last thing they will do for their daughter on this earth. Click here for a link to the Carol Joy Memorial Fund. My friend Ruth whose daughter has the only documented case of a specific chromesome deletion, wrote a beautiful tribute about Carol Joy coming to visit her daughter in the NICU.

2010-09-03T17:54:00.000-07:00

Last spring Della was measured for a new walker. This is her second walker as the first had a few limitations. For one, the wheels didn't swivel. I think the idea was, that Della was supposed to lift slightly on the walker and redirect is path when she wanted to turn. But she is either too weak or never quite caught on to this concept. Which was hard because as exciting as it was for her to use the walker, it was also sort of pointless unless one of us followed along side making corrections for her. Really, she could only go straight until she ran into something. Which at that time, she would just start ramming the walker into what ever the obstacle was until someone came and turned her around.

So now with a swivel, Della has free reign to go where ever she wants. Which, has presented a whole new set of problems for us. Here she is getting in the trash can.

As with her last walker, Caitlin made a name plate.

Brother and Little Sis

2010-08-30T10:37:00.000-07:00

About a month ago we had an experience that got me thinking about this post, so when Amy wrote about her son Nathan, I decided to copy her.
It's really hot here in Texas so on those days when the heat index is 115 degrees, I like to take my stir-crazy kids to an indoor playground. On this particular trip we met up with a friend and her daughter. After helping Della walk around the playground I set her in a small "boat" that she couldn't easily climb out of. The boat had two seats and so I asked Archer if he could sit with her for a minute while I gave my back a rest. Archer enthusiastically agreed because he is sweet like that. I turn around and walk to a bench that isn't too far from where my children are. I see a little boy (maybe 18 to 24 months old) attempt to dive into the boat and onto my daughter. I see Archer stop the boy and say "No No" and something like "There isn't enough room in here for you too." Almost immediately a 60+ year-old woman wearing a embarrassingly short skirt starts wagging her finger at Archer yelling at him. I can't hear what is being said but you can bet that I was high-tailing it over there to see what was going on. By the time I get there the woman is going back to her seat. I take one look at Archer's terrified face and I pull him into a hug and he starts hysterically BAWLING. He is sobbing so hard that I can't even understand what he is saying. After a few minutes the story comes out that the woman yelled that he wasn't in charge of this playground and if a kid wants to climb into the boat, Archer has no right to say that he can't. My favorite part was she threatened to "Call the mall police" on Archer if he did anything like that again. My friend Laura who was with us wanted to go to yell at the lady, but instead she took Della by the hands and helped her walk over to where the woman was sitting. When the woman saw that Della was handicapped she immediately got up and left. The little boy that Archer kept from clobbering Della WASN'T EVEN HER KID! Meanwhile Archer is still sobbing and saying over and over again "I was just trying to protect Della! I didn't want her to get hurt and she can't say to other kids that they are hurting her!" I was super angry. Like seeing-red-spots angry. But mostly I was sad. I was sad that Archer had to endure that woman's ranting. I was sad that I had asked him to sit with Della in the first place. I was sad that he has to protect his sister at all. I was sad that the woman didn't take 5 seconds to survey the situation and that she yelled at a little boy until he was crying. But the worst part of it all was knowing that this would not be the last time something like this would happen.

This is just the way life is for Archer. We do our best to see that he gets one-on-one time with Chad and me. We have wonderful friends who offer to take him to places that Della can't go to, like the movies. When we do make a trip to somewhere special (the library, the park, etc.) sometimes we have to leave after only being there 20 minutes because the place is too loud for Della and she is throwing her goldfish at people while screaming as loud as she can. He has never complained about it. Nothing will ever change the fact that he has a sister that needs help, and sometimes that help will be him. The best/wort part is that he doesn't mind. For some reason this makes my heart hurt. How can he be so good and kind and patient when he is so young?

Archer has NEVER hit Della or done anything to intentionally hurt her out of anger or frustration. She pulls his hair, sticks her hand in his ice cream, tackles him when he is playing with the iPod, or turns off the TV while he is in the middle of a video game. Archer responds by gently prying her fingers apart to release his hair, spoon feeding her some of his ice cream, making room and cuddling next to her so she can see the iPod too, and by learning how to pause his game without having to actually see the screen.

I don't know if Chad and I will have anymore kids. If Della outlives us, it will be on Archer alone to take care of his sister. This fact makes me so sad. But, if he grows into the adult that I hope he will, I wouldn't trust her care to anyone else.

Oh, and to the lady that yelled at Archer in the mall, if you are reading this, you need to stop yelling at small children until they cry. Please try and get some mental help because clearly you have some serious issues. And one more thing, please throw away that skirt. Frankly, it was grossing everyone out.

34 Years Ago Today...

2010-08-17T12:46:00.001-07:00

Once upon a time in 1976, a baby boy named Chad was born...

He was a really cute little boy...

Who grew into...

A young man...

Sometimes Chad was a little naughty, like when he would get off the rides at Disneyland...

But he was well-behaved most of the time. Then Chad served a 2-year mission in New Zealand where he taught himself to speak another language (Tongan) in just 6 months...

A few years later he met a girl. They liked each other a lot and decided to get married...

So he built her a house...

Just in time for their son Archer to arrive. A few years later they welcomed a daughter named Della. Chad was a very good dad...

And his children loved him very much...

They love him because he is fun...

And because he is funny...

One day Chad started his own business and his family decided to move to Texas so they would have room to grow...

Even though he didn't build their new house, he has done lots of projects to make it feel like home...

Happy Birthday Chad!

Thanks for all you do for us. We love you so much.

Love,

Caitlin, Archer, and Della Belle

Sometimes Chad's Dreams Really Do Come True (Please Don't Tell Our HOA)

2010-08-13T11:03:00.000-07:00

Chad has been wanting chickens now for almost 2 years. I knew he was serious when he designed these coops over a year ago...

Well, all of Chad's wildest (chicken) dreams came true last weekend when we bought two Barred Rock pullets (hens that are too young to lay eggs but are older than chicks) for $3 each. Meet Chicken and Waffle...

So far so good. Archer has accidentally almost killed them 6 or 7 times...

And Della spends most of her day trying to find things that will fit between the bars of their cage like plastic wrap, my grocery list, Happy Meal toys, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and black beans that she threw on the ground during dinner.

For now Chicken and Waffle are too small to fend off the neighbor's cat so unless we are outside with them, we have to keep them in a cage. They will start laying eggs in a few months and will each produce 200 each per year. That's a lot of eggs.

My Daughter Is A Part-Time Model (Kinda)

2010-08-08T14:51:00.000-07:00

About 18 months ago our friends the Browns, told us that Texas Children's Hospital was looking for children who are being treated or who were ever treated at the hospital and who were willing to be photographed. The pictures would be used for the hospital's " Happy Face Project" where portraits of children will line the long hallway leading to the Ronald McDonald House. There would be no sitting fees ($495) for the photo shoot which was to be done by Evan Thayer. I didn't know until much later that he was quite a serious photographer and has done fashion spreads and photographed a few celebrities like Pres. George W. Bush Sr. and The Gambler himself Mr. Kenny Rodgers.

The session didn't go well. First of all Della's hair was doing something strange (crazy) and wasn't forming little ringlets like is usually does (of course). She was also uncharacteristically cranky but the next day she came down with a fever. I would be cranky too if I were sick and people kept telling me to smile.

Anyway, we couldn't afford to buy even one of the pictures and that was that. Then last week, a year and a half after the photo session, we got a letter from the TCH Vice President saying that Della's picture had been chosen and it was now hanging in the Abercrombie building. We drove downtown yesterday to take a few pictures of Della's picture.

Didn't it turn out beautifully?!?!

Della kept pointing to herself...

Our friends the Brown family...

The hallway with the other portraits...

Della's First Time "Talking" With The iPad

2010-08-03T18:52:00.000-07:00

The iPad we ordered for Della is here! This is video of the first time she gets to use it.

It's been amazing to see how fast she has figured it out in just the past 24 hours. In our last post we tried to give a detailed but brief overview of AAC technology, so if you would like to know more, go here.

Don't worry, Archer has already made her a button that says "I want to watch Archer play Wii." As well as one that says "I want to drink Dr. Pepper."

Della "Speaks" Her First Word And She Says She Would Like A Cracker Please

2010-07-22T17:41:00.000-07:00

We were able to get our hands on an augmentative and alternative communication (AAC) device called "VMax" which is made by Dynavox.

Essentially it is a touch screen computer with software that helps the user to communicate by constructing phrases or sentences that can be "spoken" by the machine's voice. For children that can't read, words and ideas are represented by symbols and pictures. We started using a modified version of Picture Exchange Communication System (PECS) when she was 20 months old. PECS are little cards that use symbols and line drawings that children can use to communicate.

The hard part about this was Della's inability to grasp the meanings behind line drawings. She didn't understand that the drawing represented a concept. So we started with photographs and went from there. Needless to say, it has been a looooooooong process as she is 3 and a half now.

I have been dying to let Della try one of these AAC devices and we were able to sit down with one for about 10 minutes yesterday. Della spent the first 5 playing with it. We started with 6 buttons on the screen two of which were blank. I was worried that it would be too many options since she has a hard time with more than 2 PECS cards. We showed her the button with a line drawing of a graham cracker and that when she pushed the button the device said "cracker." Della knows exactly what that means and she signed "want." After pushing the button with her hand-over-hand and giving her a cracker each time we watched to see if she could do it on her own. The feminine slightly robotic voice I heard was music to my ears. "Cracker." "Cracker." "Cracker." It was so awesome. Just to be sure that she wasn't just pushing the same area of the screen out of habit we rearranged the buttons. "Cracker." "Cracker." "Cracker." Della was talking! It was so awesome. I know I already said that, but seriously, it was.

So...how do we get one of our own. Well, they don't come cheap, that's for sure. The base model costs about $8,000 and is another $300 for the software. Hmmmm...that's a lot of money. The company has a lot of funding options from grants, school districts, insurance companies, and private donations. But it takes a long time to go through the process. A really long time. Now that I had a taste of Della's "talking", I could see endless possibilities to curb Della's increasing and escalating tantrums. Her frustration level would all but disappear if she could communicate with us. She could tell us if she is sick or hungry or tired. She could let us know that a certain place was too noisy or cold or scary. That she wanted a yellow balloon and not a green one. That she loves us.

We couldn't wait.

So we checked up on some suggestions from friends and found a solution, if only temporary. Della is about to be cooler than the rest of our family because she will be the proud owner of an iPad.

The iPad offers a really neat application called Proloquo2Go. The finished product should look like this...

So we have the base model coming in the mail. Apparently most Apple stores don't keep the that model in stock. They acted like we walked into a car dealership and asked for a model with no radio or air conditioning. Yeah, they make them, but they don't keep them on hand because who wouldn't want all the bells and whistles?

So we'll keep you posted on Della's "talk box". Meanwhile, here is a sample of two children using an AAC to speak.

Archer's Gymnastics Skillz (with a "z")

2010-07-12T11:11:00.001-07:00

Texas 730 (That's 2 Years)

2010-07-06T18:32:00.000-07:00

Today marks 2 years since we moved to Texas. Last year we posted some things that we had learned about our new home after living here a year. Who knew that there was so much more for us to learn! Here are some new "facts" that we wanted to share...

You can, in fact grow tomatoes here...

And yes, they are delicious.

It is really hot...

OK-we already knew this, but on certain days we are reminded of this fact a little more than others. P.S. Della has officially lived more of her life here in Texas than she did in California. This means that she is more Texan than we are.

Texas has it's own unique breed of ticks (of course) called the Lone Star Tick (double of course)...

Archer models one that he caught in the above picture.

The Duff sisters...

You're welcome world.

It is acceptable to use the word "Indian" when referencing Native Americans...

For example "In Archer's Kindergarten play, the Indians taught the Pilgrims to bury a fish with every corn seed they planted."

The 4th of July is waaaay more fun here...

BYOB applies to fancy restaurants...

One of our favorite restaurants La Parmigana. Their Northern Italian dishes are amazingly good. Anyway, you can walk in and wait for a table but the owners prefer that you make reservations and in my mind this practice=fancy. Recently, while we we enjoying a classic seafood calzone and the three cheese ravioli, we were a little surprised to see that the party next to us had brought their own cans and bottles of beer in a cooler (pictured above under the man on the right's feet). Not only did they bring their own cans, they also brought those foam insulators for cans (beer cozies?) in many fashionable designs such as "cammo" and "NASCAR". I wish had gotten the memo, maybe I wouldn't have felt so out of place!

Silver Alert (do you like my special effects?)

Yes, it is really called a "Silver Alert" when an elderly person goes missing. All the Amber Alert signs light up across the state with information about the missing person in hopes that they will be found. A friend pointed out to me "It seems like Texas is always losing old people!" I have started to notice that this is kind of true. We hardly ever see signs alerting us to a child abduction (thank goodness), but we have seen Silver Alerts posted on signs more often than not.

GUNS!

OK-so I made this sign on the computer, but I really did see a sign with this exact wording on it while driving. At first I didn't get it. What are you going to do with a gun, shoot the hurricane? Then I realized that the author of this sign was referring to looters. Nice. I can finally rest know that our extensive CD collection that spans the 90's and my obscene amount of scrap booking paper is safe from natural disaster-created theives! Phew! There is a corner by my house that seems to attract a lot of people selling their wares on the side of the road; fruit, pecans, honey, birdhouses, fleece blankets with tigers on them, etc. A few months ago we noticed a new roadside vendor. He sat in the blazing hot sun behind a card table with a large handwritten sign that he had duct taped to the front of it. The sign said "AMMO!" Is that even allowed?

Wes Anderson is a native Houstonian...

Mr. Anderson filmed "Rushmore" at a few different Houston schools. The fictional Rushmore Acadamy's mascot is the owl, which is also the mascot for Rice University here in Houston. I always thought that was an odd choice for a mascot. Just sayin'.

VBS!

For those of you not "in the know" VBS stands for "Vacation Bible School" and it seems like just about everyone attends at least one session during the summer. I am not poking fun at VBS, I am glad that I live in a place where there are so many church-going people. I do find it a little much when the children say "Hoo! Hoo!" instead of "Amen" at the end of a prayer. But that's just me. Below is an ad from Hobby Lobby advertising that all VBS crafts are 50% off...

Online Petetion To Help Children Like Della

2010-06-22T14:26:00.000-07:00

*I apologize if this message seems redundant. I sent this e-mail to everyone in our address book. I thought that by posting it on our blog, we could get the word out to even more people.

Dear Friends and Family,

I know that I haven't spoken to some of you in a very long time, years in some cases. But this e-mail is about our daughter Della Belle and I wanted this information to reach as many people as possible. Soon after she was born, Della was hospitalized with a virus and had to be put on a ventilator and received a blood transfusion. Although she recovered somewhat, by 6 months she was not developing normally. Extensive tests showed that Della either had a metabolic disorder or mitochondrial disease, there is no cure for either condition. Three years later we still have no diagnosis other than "mental retardation". Della functions at about a 12 month level although she is 3.5 years old. She can't walk or talk and she can only retain 2 or 3 words in sign language at this time.

A few decades ago professionals would have told us that we should place Della in an institution. Today families are taking more responsibility for their disabled children's care and keeping them at home for as long as possible. Most families spend between $30,000-$70,000 a year on services, therapies, treatment, and adaptive equipment that private insurers only partially cover or refuse to cover at all. I can attest to you that this is true. We did all that we could to pay for therapy, tests, and treatment. We took a second mortgage out on our house and when that ran out we desperately appealed to family and friends for help. Eventually we had to "short sale" our home when the real estate market crashed and we left our family and friends in California to move to the much more affordable Houston.

Onto the real purpose of this message. Home and Community Based Service Waivers and Medicaid Waivers (there are 7 total Waiver Programs here in Texas) provide services, therapies, treatment, equipment, and group homes for adults with developmental disabilities. The demand for access to these waiver programs far exceeds their availability. This discrepancy has resulted in waitlists. Tens of thousands of people are currently on waitlists to receive access to the help that their children desperately need. Waiting times vary from state to state but the average waiting time is between 5-10 years with the longest wait time being almost 30 years. You read it correctly. Years. Della is currently 2 years into an 8 to 9 year wait. If you move out of state, you lose your place in line and are automatically placed at the bottom of that state's waiting list. This is devastating to families in the military or for those who have to refuse better or higher paying jobs out of state. Please sign this online petition appealing to Congress and the President to end waitlists. That is all I am asking you to do. You don't have to give money, or mail something in, or make a phone call. Just click the link and "sign" the petition. For more information on the grassroots efforts of parents and other advocates on behalf of the disabled, please click this link to NOEWAIT: National Organization to End the Waitlists.

Thank you so much for taking time to read this. Please forward this to anyone that you would feel comfortable contacting. Hope all is well.

The Calder Family (Chad, Caitlin, Archer, and Della Belle)

Moms and Dads are heros

2010-06-01T20:01:00.000-07:00

So Archer has been working hard on his "album". It does make me nervous that we allow him to touch the computer but he really enjoys doing it and Caitlin and I get to discover the songs he's composed after he's in bed.
Within the space of an hour this evening, he completed two songs. I don't plan on posting all of his songs (trust me, some are so heavily layered with vocals, drums and other sound effects they sound more like white noise then music) but "Moms and Dads are Heros" is too good not to share.

Space Battle in Oklahoma: A Song By Archer

2010-05-28T06:50:00.000-07:00

Archer wrote and recorded this song and picked out the effects all in ONE TAKE! Archer also created the cover art which is his Lego robot in space.

I Am Pretty Sure No One Else In Kindergarten Has One Of These

2010-05-27T12:57:00.001-07:00

We were at a fundraiser dinner for the kids' school and Archer ran off to the playground. We saw him 10 minutes later being crying and being carried by some poor sap who happened to be a bystander to my son's accident. When asked what happened, Archer explained that a kid had dared him to do a trick on the monkey bars and he "messed up", fell, and hurt his foot. He was crying pretty hard, but we have a rather dramatic son and we just thought that this was another exaggerated injury. We changed our minds around 10PM when his continuos complaints were frequently interrupted by crying. I took him to the ER. All sorts of terrible thoughts entered my head as I imagined a summer with Archer's leg in a plaster cast. Archer asked me questions like "Can I swim with a cast on? What about Slip-N-Slide? How about water guns?" You get the idea. Thankfully, the x-ray showed that no broken bones but he did have some bad bruising which was apparent just by looking at his swollen foot. We were sent home at 1AM with orders to "take it easy" and this awesome boot. Archer put it on and exclaimed "Mom! I am pretty sure no one else in Kindergarten has one of these!"

I spent the next day at home with him. Archer insisted that I needed to carry him everywhere. If I refused he would drag his back half around as he crawled on the floor crying. Nice.

One Small Bite For Man, One Giant Leap For Della

2010-05-27T12:38:00.000-07:00

Della has been going to school for 5 months now. She loves it. Especially when Mrs. Pouncy does her hair (see above picture). Sadly, she has no idea that it is about to end 6 days from now for Summer Break. She is going to be very upset.

It's been a very busy 5 months for our daughter and she has made so much progress. As to why, my guess is that seeing other children talking, walking, eating, etc. has motivated her to do the same. You know what they say about peer pressure. Here is a short list of her accomplishments since starting school:

Using a spoon (sometimes, when she feels like it, which is not often, but I'm counting it anyway).
Imitating others- like rolling her hands when singing "Wheels On the Bus".
Signing the word "more" appropriately.
Using the POTTY! Yes, that's right. She is using the potty. When I saw that her teacher had written it as one of Della's goals, I laughed. Who's laughing now? I'll admit that it isn't perfect. She doesn't tell us when she needs to go and we aren't sure if she isn't able to learn/retain the sign or if she simply hasn't recognized the urge. But- every afternoon, I set her on the potty and she does her #2. I know this is gross, but look at it from our point of view. We were convinced that she would wear diapers forever.
Trying to "talk". She still doesn't have any consistant babbleing but she will look you in the eyes and her tone takes on a conversation like sound.
She can point out our eyes, nose, mouth, ear, and hair correctly. Usually.
She is pointing with her finger. Sometimes.
Following one-step commands like "Put the ball into the bucket."

That's all I can think of for now. Meanwhile, enjoy this video of Della's newly acquired spoon skills. When I saw that this would be a rare moment of cooperation, I ran and got the camera. Here's what ensued...

It's Working!

2010-05-27T12:14:00.000-07:00

That is what I thought to myself as I picked these...

The blackberries look mouthwatering. Too bad there are only have 23 of them.

Relieved To Be Disappointed and Disappointed To Be Relieved

2010-05-23T15:20:00.000-07:00

In April we were able to meet with a doctor that specializes in inherited diseases and birth defects at the Texas Children's Hospital/Baylor School of Medicine Genetics Clinic. There were some rare genetic disorders that he wanted to test for, but even though Della had a few of the obvious symptoms included in each of these specific syndromes, she seemed to be missing one or two of the "hallmark" traits that really defines those who have it. Given her past abnormal metabolic test results, the doctor also wanted to test Della for a small obscure group of disorders involving the body's ability (or inability) to correctly metabolize creatine.

*A Lesson In Metabolic Function Involving Creatine For The Average Joe (or people like me)*

When most of us think of creatine, we think of the supplements that athletes and body builders use to increase muscle mass. Our bodies naturally create creatine through the food we eat, namely meat. Creatine is essential in building muscle and if a person's body was unable to produce/metabolize/use creatine then obviously they would have low muscle tone (aka hypotonia). Della has long struggled with hypotonia, especially in her "trunk" or midsection as well as in her legs this being the primary reason she can't walk. But, creatine is also essential in brain function, specifically in the area of speech and without it a person would be left pretty much without any expressive language skills and low receptive language ability. Well- Della's hypotonia and non-verbalism are her two most prominent symptoms.

Back to the doctor's appointment...I started to get really excited when the doctor continued to explain that through strict diet (no meat or dairy) combined with a creatine supplement, children with this metabolic disorder show considerable improvement in mobility, fine and gross motor skills, coordination, and speech. He was quick to point out that there was no cure for this particular disorder, but there was a possibility, and a good one at that, for improvement.

We have been doing this for 3 and a half years, this seemingly never ending cycle of diagnostic tests and guesses accompanied by the hope we are incapable of suppressing and the dread we are incapable of escaping. It can be emotionally exhausting and we have gotten pretty good at pretending we aren't thinking about it, especially during the impossibly slow passage of time between tests and their results. These most recent tests were particularly agonizing to wait for because the results took almost 3 weeks (the amount of time it takes to "grow" the chromosomes) and because for the first time, there might be something we could actually do to improve Della's condition. We had always thought that there was nothing we could specifically do to change her situation. It is similar to a child who has Down Syndrome. Yes, there are therapies that can help that child's development to progress, but there is no drug or diet that can actually change that child's prognosis. This is what we have believed to be true about Della. That is, until this past April.

It is really really difficult to not get your hopes up too much. We tried, we really did. But the more we read on the Internet, the more our hope grew. This specific metabolic disorder involving creatine is very new, so new in fact, that hardly any information is written in layman's terms (think Wikipedia). So I have scrupulously searched through online medical journals and studies. It literally reads like Greek: Chorea (χορεία), Hemiballism, Athetosis, High amplititude theta-delta background, Progr neurol & psychiatric deterioration. (Creatine Deficiency Syndromes Clinical Presentation, Sylvia Stöckler-Ipsiroglu, Div Biochemical Diseases, BCCH, Vancouver). But in that same article I came across this short list of symptoms: Eye rolling, holding breath, loss tone, stiffness. This is my daughter to a T.

So the results are in and Della does not have a metabolic disorder involving creatine. This is also where the title of this post plays out. We were really disappointed to still be left with no diagnosis but it was even worse finding out that no matter what we do, we can't improve her muscle strength or further her mind's capability to communicate. No one wants their child to have a debilitating disease or disorder, but Chad and I would be kidding ourselves if we thought Della had nothing wrong with her.

I have left messages with the geneticist, the neurologist, and her pediatrician asking them all the same question, "Now what?" There is a good chance that the collective answer will be "We don't know." Chad and I will have to learn to accept that this may be the only answer that we have for years and for maybe the duration of her life. It just leaves so many things unknown. How far will she progress? How can we best help her reach her highest potential? How long will she live? Of course we have prayed and fasted for answers and we feel confident that we are moving in the right direction as she goes to school and receives speech and physical therapy. This will have to be enough for now. In the meantime, we enjoy Della's joyful perspective, her constant smile, and her loving manner. I am not sure if we could ever get enough of those things. There really is a lot of happiness in our lives and whatever the outcome is, we will be OK. It is the not knowing that is the hardest part. Thanks again to all of those who have reached out to us in phone calls, letters, and prayers. We could never explain how much this has meant to our family.

Backyard Braggy-Brag Time

2010-05-15T17:54:00.000-07:00

Our backyard has gone from a grass/weed patch to a garden/annoying neighborhood kid hangout in one year. Chad finished up the entrance pergola...

Current status of the playhouse/fort/man school (neighbor kid death trap)...

So in the 3 crops of tomatoes that we have planted since we moved here we have eaten approximately NONE tomatoes. This crop looks very promising. Chad and I have been outside everyday weeding, mulching, fertilizing, singing to, and generally loving on these plants. I don't know who is watching them more closely, us or the mockingbirds who will obliterate any tomato that shows the slightest hint of pink.

PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! Let us eat some tomatoes!!!

I finally understand why there are many scriptural references to "pray over your crops."

Puh-leeee-heee-heee-eeeezzzz!

The "Upside" of Having A Special Needs/Disabled/Handicapped Child

2010-04-29T12:11:00.000-07:00

To most people looking in, having a disabled child seems hard, sad, difficult, exhausting, disappointing, etc. Well, they would be right. BUT, there are some wonderful blessings that come from Della being in our family. She has taught us so many things some of the more obvious being undconditional love, gratitude, long-suffering, patience, meekness, innocence, sacrifice, faith, hope, and charity. Some of the not so obvious things we've learned include wants vs. needs, the ins and outs of insurance, the miracle that our bodies are (chemistry, biology, metabolics, genetics, brain function, the complexity of seemingly simple actions like walking, etc.), time management (still learning this one), and finding joy in simple things. Sometimes I feel bad for those who don't have a child like Della. How do people learn and grow and make needed changes without serious motivation? I had no idea what life was about until I had her. I thought I had "the basics" down, but I really feel like Della helped me to grow up.

There isn't a day (an hour?) that goes by that I don't think about Della. What will her future be like? How will we take care of her as adult? Will she learn to walk or talk? When will children stop inviting her to birthday parties? Will the youth at church include her in activities (or not)? Will we be able to serve missions for our church when we retire? What will happen to her if we die first? The list goes on. However there are some "perks" that come with Della. I thought I would name a few here starting with the more trivial and ending with the most important.

Handicapped parking. Need I say more?

Muscles and exercise. Della is getting bigger and my arms now resemble Angelina Jolie's. Della is also my exercise and this is how I have lost 45 lbs.

Front of the line pass at Disneyland. Della says "Waiting in line is for suckers!"

Special Events. There are a lot of opportunities for handicapped children and their families to get backstage access, meet celebrities, and other unique opportunities. Next year we hope to go to the Houston Rodeo's Lil' Rustlers Rodeo where disabled children (and their siblings) can learn about and try different rodeo events with the pro's. Plus, they get to ride a horse around Reliant Stadium. Hello? Who wouldn't want to do that?

No sassiness or talking back. At least for now.

I can dress her however I want. Read cute.

We are hilarious to her...
Most people really are nice. So many people don't get to experience the kindness that exists in the world. An elderly man helped me to load Della onto a tram despite his own physical ailments. A few of the doctors and many of the nurses and therapists we've worked with have shed tears of true sadness as well as true joy. Some of them have become close friends. Or meeting another mother whose child also has a disability. Even if our children are complete opposites, sometimes you make eye contact and you realize that you have found someone who understands and who knows. Nothing like crying with a stranger in the middle of Target!

No worries about teenage pregnancy, illicit drug use, etc. Della probably won't know about tragedy, the meanness, or the unhappiness that most of us experience in this life.

I am way stronger than I thought. I can do hard things.

We are blessed with a special love for Della. I don't love her more than Archer, but I do love her in a different way. Della is the cutest, sweetest, most perfect child to me. I love her so much that it is hard to leave her and it is this love that helps to overcome any feelings of exhaustion, frustration, and keeps me from becoming overwhelmed. Everything she does is funny. At every meal, whenever she is done eating, Della throws all leftover food onto the floor. All of it must be out of her sight including her plate and cup. It makes a HUGE mess after every meal. But it is so funny to Chad, Archer, and me. We try not to let her see us laugh, but sometimes we can't hide it. I am laughing to myself right now. If Archer had done this at any age, I am pretty sure I wouldn't have thought this funny in the least. I just now went downstairs and took a picture of where she sits. This is after breakfast and lunch for just today...

My son will be a more compassionate person...

Have you ever met a family that has a severely handicapped child that also has a "wayward child?" Me neither. I am not saying that those families don't exist nor am I saying my son is perfect. But, I can already see differences in his perspective when compared with other children. This makes me both happy and sad. I don't think we have to worry about Archer ending up in jail for robbing a bank. Don't quote me on that though.

As her mom and dad, we will always be Della's favorite...

She has "made it." In our church, we believe that all children are innocent until they reach the age of accountability (when they can choose for themselves between right and wrong). This is why we wait until children turn 8 years-old to baptize them instead of performing this saving and necessary ordinance when they are infants. Della may not ever reach that age mentally speaking. If she ever voiced her desire to baptized and if we felt she understood what that meant, of course we would not deny her this opportunity. But, if she never fully reaches this "age of accountability" then we believe that when she dies, she will go to heaven, just as a child who dies before they turn 8. Talk about motivation! Suddenly earning my place beside her is very important to me.

Archer! What Happened To Your Face!?!

2010-04-29T07:22:00.000-07:00

Archer walks out of his room Tuesday morning and his nose has a big scab on it...
Me: Archer! What happened to your face!?!
Archer: What?
Me: Your nose is all scabbed over!
Archer: It is?
Me: Yes, it looks like a rug burn.
Archer: What is a rug burn?
Me: (I explain what rug burn is.)
Archer: No I don't think it was that.
Me: Then how did your nose get hurt? It happened after you went to bed because it wasn't there when we tucked you in last night.
Archer: I'm not really sure.

We have taught Archer that if he ever gets separated from us, to find an adult, preferably a "worker" (store employee) or a policeman, and to tell them that he is lost. He has taken this lesson to heart, perhaps even a little too much. If he can't find us for longer than 30 seconds, he immediately will tell someone he is lost. We recently went to a church picnic and I told Archer to stay in the playground area while I went and got us all some food. I pointed out 3 or 4 adults that he knew and told him to ask one of them for help if he needed it. I had been in the food line for maybe 5 minutes when my cell phone starts ringing. I didn't recognize the number and since I was about to load up on food, I didn't answer it. The mystery number called me 4 more times. I rushed to put my food down so I could answer it...
Me: (breathlessly) Hello?
Lady: Hello, Mrs. Calder?
Me: Yes, that's me.
Lady: My name is Carol and I have your lost son.
Me: Archer?
Carol: Yes, I am with him. I am sure you have been frantic looking for him.
Me: Uhhh....yeah....frantic...
Carol: Well we are standing over by the food table so why don't you come and meet us.
Me: I am at the food table.
Carol: You are?
I look around and see Archer standing next to "Carol" about 50 feet away.

He recently got "lost" at the Antique Rose Emporium. I had just taken a picture of him and less than 3 minutes later I hear a man yelling "Is there a Caitlin Calder here!" I look up, slightly shocked that someone is screaming my name, and I see a man who clearly works there standing with Archer about 20 yards away. Seriously! I already feel bad that I ignored my son's whereabouts long enough for him to feel lost plus I feel like whoever he has turned to for help is thinking I am the worst parent!

This happened again on Friday night at the American Cancer Society's Relay for Life. I am eating dinner and a woman wearing a "Staff" t-shirt comes up to Chad and me holding Archer's hand. Of course I know what is going on...
Staff Lady: Is this your son?
Me: Yes it is.
Staff Lady: (into walkie-talkie or whatever it's called) All units, we have found the child's mother I repeat we have found the child's mother.

She looked at me like I was some kind of jerk mom eating a piece of pizza while her son is lost and the entire staff is looking for him. Nice. I did find out later from a friend that Archer had bumped into her before reporting his status as missing...
Archer: Hey, I know you.
Jami: Yes, I am Carter's mom.
Archer: Oh, hi! Can I have a dollar?
Jami: No.

So not only does my child have unexplained injuries, he is also begging for money whenever he gets lost. Does he think that if he hasn't seen his parents in the last 2 minutes he is now on his own and must fend for himself in the world? Where would he get that idea?

"Life Imitating Art" or "Della Looks Like Edward Scissorhands"

2010-04-29T06:45:00.000-07:00