Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Serious Hair Issues

This is how Della's hair looks every morning when she gets out of bed. It also looks like this when she wakes up from her nap...


This cockateil look is furthered by Della's repetitive almost Autistic-like head shaking when she is laying down or in her car seat. Della's hair is naturally curly. The top layer is soft, fine, and silky. Cute right? Yes, actually it is very cute...until you get to the bottom layer. Brillo pad, seriously, that's the only way to describe it. It is so course that it feels brittle and dry. Brushing out the mass of snarls is becoming a chore that my daughter and I both dread. I have tried leave-in conditioners, rinse-out conditioners, detangler sprays, and even a fancy hair "masque." Nothing helps. I was hoping that as her hair grew, the weight of the curls would help make them straighter and less likely to become tangled. Not so. Apparently the equation went like this: more hair= more tangles x 10.

So here are my options...

1. Continue brushing the rats nest that sits atop Della's head twice a day while she screams and cries real tears (this is rare for her). Oh, by the way, she has some sort of neurological/ developmental impairments and her sensory system might be hyper sensitive, making routine activities, like brushing hair, more painful or over stimulating for her. But she couldn't tell you if she was overly sensitive or not because she doesn't talk or communicate thus making it impossible for you to know what she is feeling. Also- since her receptive language skills are that of a 6 month-old, there is no way to explain why you are putting her through all this .

2. Cut it off. It seems simple enough, but the more that this option seems like the right one, the more I don't want to do it. I think I have some weird emotional attachment to her hair. Almost like it is the one thing that I can control in her life. I can't make the connections in her brain enabling her to talk, I can't give her the strength she needs in her muscles to walk, I can't explain to her why she get poked and prodded all the time, I can't watch her enjoy playing princess, I can't even ask her what her favorite color is. But her hair, that is one thing I can do something with. Just like other mothers do for their daughters. See, I told you it was weird.

So unless ya'll (Texas talk) know of some miracle de-rats-nesting product, I think I will have to go with option number two. At this point, no idea is too outrageous. I would slather her head in Crisco if I thought it would work. Feel free to contact me with your ideas. In the meantime, here are some pictures of Delly-Bean with Cinnamon Toast Crunch all over her face...



4 comments:

Amy said...

I understand how you feel. It was like reading my journal from years ago. I just cut Mia's hair into a bob. I didn't want to. I loved her pigtails. But she just doesn't have the hair for it. I'm so glad I did- it really was the best choice for us. Maybe if you have coolcuts or something similar just take an inch it would make a huge difference.

Allison said...

I was going to say something similar to Amy. You don't have to necessarily give her a pixie cut right off the bat. Maybe a few inches will help. You can always do it a little at a time.

Science Teacher Mommy said...

I'm using a biolage hair product right now that is so thick it comes in a tub instead of a squeezie bottle. It is the best smoother I've ever used. The humidity makes the brillo pad hair worse.

What about a short in the back, long on the top bob? Keep the cute curls, whack the stressful ones?

Karin said...

Okay, there is a book out there called "Curly girls" and has some *excellent" info on how to take care of curly hair. Cutting it short won't take care of the brushing/sensory issue, but this book will. Apparently, curls don't like to be brushed and they do better without it. I wouldn't have believed you, but I've started to do my own hair this way (I have wavy hair that has been just bad enough to keep it from doing anything I want it to) and it's been a miracle. I actually don't brush much anymore (about once per week)and my hair is almost to the middle of my back now. It also curls much more consistently and much more uniformly. The website is also very infomrative, but incomplete when it comes to the care regimen. It's a super quick, easy read, so it won't be very difficult. :-)

Much Luck...

Mine has been hanging upside down for the last two weeks because she can't get enough stimulation and we're thinking about putting her in a leotard and bike shorts permanently. :-)